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  • My lovely self, in the psych ward.

    So there’s this thing I never talked about, before I stopped talking altogether. I didn’t talk because I couldn’t talk, because it was all too close and awful, and the other day I read this thing and now, in my head, I can’t stop talking. http://www.psmag.com/navigation/health-and-behavior/lovely-wife-psych-ward-95567/ I didn’t talk because I couldn’t, because, in June…

  • Quiet, now.

    This has been total hell. The whole spring-into-summer. One slow-burning, creeping infection that reinvented itself hourly. There was the hospitalization, of course, but that was just the beginning. That was only the spark. It wasn’t like last time, this past time – again, June. There was no brandishing grand hopes of success or faith in newly…

  • Intra-synaptic swordfighting

    Somehow, I don’t know how, I mis-read the instructions on my bottle of Venlafaxine (generic for Effexor) XR and wound up amping my already high dose to nearly double what’s recommended for human consumption. I’ve been reading since I was two. Like, HOW do you mess that up. Anyway, not only did I *completely* mess…

  • Delusions.

    Like most people with mood disorders, I’ve always loved reading books about other people with mood disorders. More than one of them have had a bipolar protagonist. And I’ve always thought, while reading: “Huh. That kind of reminds me of… me”. This is not to say that I’m inclined to wear a tutu to the…

  • Better Living Through Chemistry

    “It’s time to get off Abilify,” I thought to myself some time ago, and began the (supervised) process of titrating down. Abilify is the miracle drug that keeps me together like glue. It’s also a $500/month prescription that’s only available in brand-name. I mean, I could lease a really nice car for that much money, or…

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