I did a lot of things today.

I did a lot of things today. I set up a bank account for ECA Productions, I entered my 2010 expenses into Quicken, I digitized four hours of tape, I went to see my shrink. I washed my hair and blow-dried, I remembered to brush my teeth, and I tried (and failed) to find the mystery button on my boss’ furnace. I expanded my knowledge of 3D filmmaking, I backed up all my wedding projects, I went out to eat for dinner and I fed my cat. Twice. My apartment is relatively clean, my finances are in their usual state of (dis)order – no worse or better than usual. Everything is mostly good.

So what is it about this situation that makes me want to leap out of my skin?

I always feel like there are so many things left UN-done. I still have to find a dentist, and, for that matter, an accountant. I’m running out of socks. That bag of cat supplies is still sitting right where it was three weeks ago, and, no matter how many times I sweep, there is ALWAYS Jakefood in the corner next to the oven. It’s not like a treadmill, it’s more a sensation of free-fall. Like no matter how fast you spin, it’s all getting away from you. Eventually, the bathroom sink will get gross again, you know, and there’s just no stopping it.

This all must sound very fatalist and horrible, and I don’t mean it that way, but it’s what I’ve been thinking about lately. Resources, inertia, motivation. I think I’ve effectively lost the ability to relax.

But at least the apartment is clean.

… kind of.

5 Responses to I did a lot of things today.

  1. Rachel says:

    I think about this shit a lot. Probably more than normal. [edited for tangential neurotic ramblings]

    Like

  2. Megan says:

    join the club. I feel like I am more organized than most…..yet you should see the amount of crap that I am thowing away at the end of every week (Junk mail, old clothes, old papers) not to mention the amount of hair and dust that accumulates on my bathroom floor. It is just a never ending cylce and when I think about it, it exhausts me. HOWEVER….on Sunday I took the whole day as a me day, and relized that at 4 in the afternoon, I had done everything I possibly could do to organize my life. I watched 5 episodes of Greys Anatomy. It was amazing. Now it is Tuesday and my house is a mess again 🙂

    Like

  3. Kathy says:

    Umm, may seem weird but my dentist is great….Dr Cadell in Malden 781.324.6200 He never says you need something done if it doesnt need it and all the dental assistants are very nice…..

    Like

  4. meredith says:

    I can’t count the number of times I walk by the dustbunnies next to my bookshelf in the bedroom and say, “I need to get those. It would be so easy.” And by the time I’m in the kitchen where the broom is, some animal needs to be let out or I suddenly move into work mode. Yeah, I get it. I’m an editor so seeing what’s wrong is my business. Sometimes I just turn my head. Or maybe it’s the meds helping me lose my memory!

    Like

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