There’s nothing like waiting for a check to clear. Especially when that check is nudging the boundary between four figures and five and/or when you’ve been holding onto said check for over a week because you’ve been too lazy to actually physically visit an ATM and deposit it.

Does that make me a bad person? That I have this huge back salary check, with which I plan to not just pay DOWN but pay OFF my high-interest credit card, and I can’t be bothered to stop at a bank like a normal human being?

Seriously, WHAT IS WRONG with me?