Did I mention that I hate my brain?

Does this thing happen to other people where you settle on something, like say, an apartment, and you’re all psyched about it for a second or whatever and then you start getting very UN-psyched about it?

this morning found me poring over the craigslist apartment page again, looking at no-fee offerings in the Brighton area, and seeing studios with “eat-in kitchens” and “hardwood floors” and “24 hour management” for “less money than the studio that we settled on”. THen I start thinking how Cleveland Circle isn’t anywhere I ever wanted to live anyway, and it’s really only like a mile from where we live now, and we’ll have to deal with parking and Katsumi might even have a *longer* commute and there’ll be STUDENTS all over the place like little drunken flies in my proverbial honey.

WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF?? I was in LOVE with the apartmnet!! The minute we walked in, we were both awestruck!! There was no question in our minds that THIS WAS THE APARTMENT. Now, I just don’t know. I have never been a person who could live with decisions. I can’t choose and walk away. Even when we go out to DINNER, choosing an entree is an agonizing feat that often requires a list of pros and cons for chicken gumbo v. black bean soup. And I ALWAYS change my mind right after the waiter has left the table.

If I’m like that about soup, how the fuck am I ever going to choose an apartment, a reception venue, my bridesmaids, THE MOTHERFUCKING DRESS? IVORY OR CHAMPAGNE??? BALL GOWN OR TRUMPET?? WHAT ABOUT AN EMPIRE WAIST????

Concerned friends may send antianxiety meds of their choosing c/o marshall realty on comm ave.

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