fake meme from Tom

I saw this list on tom’s site and was like, wow, that would make for a damn fine meme. So I’m considering myself tagged. And lo, henceforth I will tag others. And if you don’t like it, you know what you can go ahead a FUCK OFF because I had to come into work early this morning and there was no coffee and also no diet coke. Maybe later there will be more, but for now there is the meme.


Candy Bars
1. Milky Way, especially when frozen
2. Charleston Chew, vanilla inside, especially when lightly chilled
3. Three Musketeers
4. Heath Bar (I used to think heath bars were for old people because my grandmother ate one once and it was the only piece of candy I’d ever seen her eat. Now I must be old too, because i love them.)
5. Sumphony with the almond and toffee chips. But I don’t think they make those anymore.

Shows that were on Nickelodeon that year my parents had cable when I was a kid
1. n/a. My parents never had cable until I was out of the house. But I do like Rugrats.

Disney cartoons:
1. Ducktales
2. Talespin
3. Gummi Bears

Now I hate Disney and would rather gouge out my eyes with a hot poker than watch anything made by those conglomerate shits.

Video games I’ve played
1. Mario Kart
2. Mario Sunshine
3. Tetris
4. Tony Hawke’s something-or-other
5. some snowboarding game

I also hate video games. mostly because I’m bad at them, which I blame on my parents. in addition to not having cable, my parents also refused to buy me a game system. now that I live on my own, they have three. I call bullshit.

Inventions (all-time)
1. The written word
2. The wheel
3. my new cell phone
4. direct deposit
5. Bookshelves

Favorite Office Supplies
1. Those funky paperclips that are twisted up like pretzels
2. The venerable three-ring binder
3. Quality pens. I get the best ones from my shrink, who gets them from the drug companies.


I swear to god I’ll come up with something better if I can ever get properly caffienated. Shanna, tresa, colleen, boozie, sabominator, androxx, styro, estella, if any of you guys are as dead as I am this Friday morn, you’re more than welcome to hop on the fake meme bandwagon.

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