Last night Katsumi was away. It sounds bad, but I love the nights he’s away. I value solitude, and between the shoebox apartment and, well, WORK, there’s not really very much solitude goin’ around.

When I get a whole night alone, i usually plan in advance. I rent movies that he would never watch, i get food that he wouldn’t eat, I do dishes and laundry and play guitar and sing. And I get drunk. DRUNNNN-K. Just because I can.

so last night I bedded down with 2 discs of Six Feet Under and a bottle of Spanish wine. During the day I had been thinking how it would be so nice to just have a quiet evening, just be mellow and get to bed early, maybe read a chapter in my book. I had the only the best of intentions. But I got so excited about having the apartment to myself and then I got so sad watching the DVDs and then I drank more wine and got sadder and cried and watched another episode and drank some vodka and had a cigarette and then some more wine – this time MIXED with vodka – watched another episode and then all of a sudden it was 2:30 AM and the vodka and the wine had taken their toll.

I think it’s a good thing I don’t have my own place. I’d be living on canned tuna and Belvedere.