everyone shut up and leave me alone


not you guys, of course, but everyone ELSE that I have to DEAL with in REAL life. It’s been one of those Mondays where you are astonished that the human race can collectively get up and dress itself in the morning, where you are astonished that we actually evolved opposable thumbs and one of those days when creationism starts to seem a more likely excuse for we homo sapiens ending up where we are. No particular reason, just the Monday vibe, I think. And idiocy.

Like, COP CAR. HELLO. I know you’re all “above the law” and shit, but blowing past the guy in the far left lane and almost killing me in the process is NOT COOL. And then when you swipe over into the right lane and off onto that weird service road, it would be APPROPRIATE TO USE A BLINKER.

Like, BARISTA. HELLO. When I order a Freddo Swirl, a Jasmine Cooler and a Skim Cappuccino, it should stand to reason that I not only want the Freddo Swirl, but the Jasmine Cooler and the Skim Cappuccino as well. SKIM, a SKIM cappuccino, not this full-fat bullshit you’re trying to scam. S-K-I-M. What’s hard?

Like, FLICKR. HELLO. I DON’T HAVE A YAHOO ACCOUNT. so STOP giving me the option to sign in with my yahoo account EVERY TIME I TRY TO LOG IN.

So here is a picture of me with a DAT machine between my tits.


also, I wanted to say that I really appreciate all the comments people left on that last post. I was worried that people would get all up in arms about it, and I was worried that i would misrepresent myself and come off all asshole-ish and offend people unintentionally. So all the positive response made me feel warm and fuzzy. Thanks! πŸ™‚

I now return you to your regularly bitchy program.

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