ok, so I don’t know if this happens with guys too, but I am having a serious BAD CLOTHES DAY. The ensemble du jour is a patterned halter dress over jeans with an ivory-hued loose-knit sweater. Sounds nice, right?

WRONG.

wrong wrong wrong.

I seem to have bloated overnight and the jeans are too tight, the bodice of the dress has never fit me right and I can’t actually breathe very deeply at all, and I wore a halter top yesterday and somehow forgot that it gave me a RAGING MIGRAINE HEADACHE. So now I have to wear the dress UNTIED at the top with the sweater (which is not as form-fitting as I may have thought and is actually at this very moment bagging out around my gut making me look very britney spears, if you know what I mean) over it.

and i have to breathe small, shallow breaths. Have I mentioned that I am in a crabby mood? because, hey, you know what?

I am.