At the tender age of 26, I am poised to go on my first spring break – ever. In college i was uninterested in Cancun, and when my friends decided to head for the Florida coast during the spring of our senior year I was woefully unprepared, finance-wise, and wound up spending my spring break in Jersey. While Jersey was fun, when everyone got back and told stories of drinking rum and cokes on the beach I knew that I would regret not going.

So this year is my sister’s senior year, and she, like me, has never done spring break. She thought of going away with some friends, but one thing led to another and nobody could make the trip. She wanted to go to California. She was sad. Suddenly, POW! BOOM! I realize that I have the equivalent of 1.25 free round-trip tickets and will soon be a woman of leisure! I think it’s time for a spring break of my own.

We’re going to LA! YAY!!

So look the eff out west coast, THE SISTERS ARE A’COMIN.

and I’ve got some shit in my teeth.