SATURDAY

1AM: go to bed
2AM: stare out window
3AM: stare out window
4AM: stare out window
4:15am: finally pass out

6:15am: wake up from dream to the sound of two cats tearing each other’s ears off
6:30am: doze
7am: wake up from doze to the sound of neighbor screaming at husband
7:30am: try to ingore family waking up
8am: continue attempted tuning out of family
8:15am: give up, get up, get coffee
8:30am: dress for sister’s confirmation
9am: head out to church

9am-10am: in church. Ponder why it is you don’t attend mass anymore
11:30am: still in church. Remembering why it is you don’t attend mass anymore
12:05pm: flee church, kiss sister, head to grocery store
12:30pm: buy soda for wedding shower
12:50pm: barely make it to wedding shower before guests arrive

1pm – 3:30: at shower. Drink as many mimosas and diet cokes as possible, try to quell jealousy as bride opens package after package of these

3:35pm: stuff face with kielbasa, head up to newton to pick up katsumi.
4:05pm: at apartment, katsumi in tow, drive to Maine.
4:15pm: red bull #1
4:45pm: red bull #2

5:20pm: collapse in chair, order wine.
5:30 – 8:30: consume assorted sea-dwelling creatures in company of family.

9pm: hit up the irish bar on beach, listen to irish music (Tom O’Carroll, pictured above) and drink gin.
9:45pm: head back to MA for party.

10:45pm: arrive at party
10:46pm: change into jeans
10:47pm: drink beer
11pm: finish beer, move on to wine
11 – 1am: drink more wine, enjoy conversation, smoke cigarettes

1am: leave party
1:20am: help lost woman find way to I-95, realize mid-directions that I probably smell like a winery. Decide not to reassure her of my relative sobriety for fear of seeming suspicious.
2am: arrive home
2:01am: die.

so you see why there was no posting yesterday.

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