Many of you who know me in real life have heard this story, so sorry. Don’t read if you feel that way about it.

In Little Italy, only moments after the end of the last post, I decided I had better buy some espresso for later. Lately I’ve been getting tired at 10PM and that just would not do for the fantabulous barbeque I was about to attend. So I pop into Sambuca’s cafe with every hope of procuring a quad-shot espresso over ice.

e$: (to drink-maker-man) Hi, could I have 4 shots of espresso over ice?
man: 4 shots…. over ice?
e$: yeah.

drink-maker man takes care of few other orders then pulls out 4 espresso cups

man: to go?
e$: yeah…. um, they all need to be in one cup.
man: eh?
e$: 4 shots, ice, one cup.

drink-maker man tentatively reaches for a cup. there are 2 rows of “hot cups”, you know, the cardboard kind, and one row of “cold cups” made from clear plastic. The drink-maker siezes on a “hot cup” and i get worried.

e$: on ice.
man: eh?

man gestures to waitress. Lets’ call her Carmen

man: ((TALKS IN SPANISH))
Carmen: (to me) what do you want?
e$: I’d like four shots of espresso over ice, please
Carmen: dos doble espressi en una copa con hielo (or something like that)
man: ah, si! si!
e$: sorry, it looked like he was going to put them all in separate cups or something…
it’s all for me. All four shots.
Carmen: si. DIEGO, UNA COPA, si?
man: si!

Carmen walks away, man looks confused and again begins fussing with the single shot cups.

man: eh…

man gestures to other waitress

man: ((talks in spanish, confused about the number of shots))
Carmen2: (to me) how many shots did you want?
e$: FOUR. WITH ICE. PLEASE.
man: dos “double shots”. ah, si…
e$: ONE. CUP.
man: si…

drink man disappears behind gargantuan espresso maker. I wait interminably as the waitstaff give me strange looks. Have I mentioned that I am covered in sweat and have several large bags dangling from my neck an limbs? So yeah. There’s that.

e$: god.

drink man emerges with a “hot cup” full of espresso with two ice cubes floating sadly at the top.

e$: eh…

EPILOGUE:

So I left the cafe with espresso. But not really espresso “over ice”. At any rate, it did the trick. I drank all four shots quickly around 10PM and managed to stay up until 6AM drinking vodka and beer, playing pool and watching the sun rise over Manhattan. So big thanks to the spanish dude masquerading as an Italian barista – your watered-down quad shot really made my evening!