1) when you go in to have her examine the burgeoning sty on your lower eyelid, and ask, “hey, what IS a sty anyway?” she will look at you like you’re covered in whale sperm and say “it’s like, a ZIT. On your EYE.”

2) when you go in to have a birth control consult, she stare in fear as though you are a fat disgusting pig. that nobody would ever want to bang.

3) after aforementioned consult, you decide on Depo Provera (which, she fails to tell you, is administered via an INTRAMUSCULAR INJECTION INTO YOUR ASS), and are mortified by aforementioned stare as you lower your jeans and expose your mammoth, caucasian behind.